Adis!

No comic!

2008-03-14T16:38:27Z

Having technical issues today (which seems to be the theme for my life this week, lol)and the comic is not updating. I'll keep trying. If not, then I'll post it either tomorrow (marriage day!) or monday.
Now if you'll excuse me, I'll go practice tying the laces on my fancy shoes.
-adis!

wistfulshakes

2008-03-01T02:25:45Z

Hospitals are similar to hotels in many ways. Both have comfortable but nondescript rooms, a television, a dvd player, a sanitized bathroom, and a dvd player. Both make me feel kinda at home but slightly uncomfortable, like when you visit your favorite uncle for a while, it's almost there, but not quite. You feel enough at ease to relax, but you would think twice about putting your feet up the tale.
The difference, obviously, are in the details. As bad as some hotel stays can be, in a hospital room the occupants are hardly ever comfortable for long. Sure, women have babies and people have phantom limbs removed, but it is always an uncomfortable experience.
When you are the one laying on the bed, everything is at a standstill, and you are unsure of the nicety of the people who come to see you; your family is supposed to be there smiling, and the nurses are doing their job. None of that is different from the eternal smirks of hotel employees.
However, no hotel clerk has ever cured my fiancee from pneumonia, so for that I pick the hospital. (Not to mention that the private hospital we stayed at had something that resembled room service. Sure, doctors and nurses and people came and went inside the room almost every hour, but I ate hearty meals three times a day, much better than I'd been feeding myself. They made brilliant milkshakes. Is it wrong to miss them?)

Now go to bed,
-adis!

Odd

2008-02-21T05:35:57Z

There's no comic for today, thursday. Liliana, my fiancee, has been suffering from a very persistent cough for the past month or so. We all thought it was due to the nervousness of the wedding, a phyisical reaction to the stress. So when she woke up today coughing it didn't seem odd, it was even normal. Except it only got worse as the day went on. We ended up paying the emergency room a visit and even then I though they'd just give her a shot and send her home, but that didn't happen, it was severe enough to have her admitted with a bronchial infection, and then later in the afternoon they said it was a severe pneumonia, and thus here we are now, me here and her spending at least the next 24 hours in the ICU. And it was just a cough.
She's been in great spirits, even though she'll probably still be in there by friday, her birthday, and even though she doesn't feel ICU bad, she didn't collapse or anything, she was fine and awake and talking and lively when she took her there. I'm still in a daze over how things quickly spiraled to that point.
The thing is, it's been quite a scare, and I obviously haven't had time to work on the comic or on anything else today. But I'll catch up. Soon.
Now go to bed,
-adis!

Meoow!

2008-02-07T18:21:43Z

Hi. Sorry I've been away for so long. I've actually got a few things to say, about stuff that's happened to me:

As you all know, I've got a cat now. I've been keeping a mental record of the things he does, just so I can talk about them later. One thing he does do is wanting to be in the same room I am. He wakes me up at 8:30 in the morning just so I go with him to the kitchen and look at him eat his leftover food from the previous night. He gets mightily offended if I don't. He's odd and fidgety and terribly moody, and I get the feeling he believes I do get him most of the time, which is why he gets so frustrated when i don't. Here's a picture of the both of us. The one with a lot of hair is me, the one in grey is Tapete.

Also, as you know, I'm getting married. The best things in life are free, but a lot of the things that surrounds them are a bit steep. Everything is going well, actually, and I'm quite happy, but I think I may be in need of some help. I don't like doing it anymore than I should, but it's one of those time when I ask readers for any little dollar they might want to part with. Just so I don't spend any goodwill from the readers I may have left, I promise I'll even remove (yes, remove!) the donation page from this website for the rest of the year, just so you don't have to feel like I'm constantly begging. I will send people wallpapers and special surprises (another promise I intend to keep) and I'll be forever grateful.

But that's not all! I have also put up some new strips for sale, including.... drumroll please... Laurie's first appereance! It's true, you can find them here:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&ssPageName=STRK:MESEX:IT&item=110222545733&_trksid=p3984.cSELL.m315.lVI
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&ssPageName=STRK:MESEX:IT&item=110222546323&_trksid=p3984.cSELL.m315.lVI
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&ssPageName=STRK:MESEX:IT&item=110222547286&_trksid=p3984.cSELL.m315.lVI

Thanks a million (boy, would a million help me out!)
-adis!

Report from...me!

2007-11-01T06:30:29Z

Hello everyone, it's me, your fearless author, absent for too long. You know I'm alive because the strip's still appearing obviously. I'm really busy these days, and I still manage to make the strip every single day, and it's quite surprising.
Let's see, what else? The wedding is going great, Liliana is a great girl who is willing to put up with a big child/dreamer like myself, with not a lot to his name. (Which is a relief!) I want things to go right, and that's one of the reasons I'm busy, I'm being responsible and adult, quite a big change for me :)
Also, there won't be t-shirts, merch or anything similar for the time being, I'm without a distributor and it's not economically feasible for me to tackle something like that right now. But who knows, maybe someday. In the meantime, rain, sleet or snow, you'll see the strip right where it's always been. For a while there, I saw it a bit as a means to an end: riches, fame, and stardom (but mostly riches.) And that's no way to try and create art, the comic is what it is; a labor of my love for the medium, followed by many who love it, and something that might not lead to an empire, or even a full-time job, just a solid body of work I can be proud of.

As for the riches, does anyone know a good horse to bet on? ;)

now go to bed,
-adis!

Addicted to bad buble placement

2007-10-04T22:00:26Z

It's the third (THIRD!) time this week that I've had to go back and correct the day's strip because a bubble is pointing in the wrong direction. When that happens once, I'm usually super careful the next time, except this time it happened again the following day, then, I was extra careful the next day and got it right, and then, I was still careful for the following strip, and despite my efforts, I did it again. It's odd because I check them a few times, and for the life of me, I just don't see it. In my head, it looks the way it's supposed to.
It's not until the morning when someone emails me, that I realize I'm an idiot who can't get his bubbles to point in the right direction. I want to apologize because I make a point of presenting the best product as possible, and I've been unsuccessful this week. (In my opinion, a wrongly placed bubble shatters the illusion of the narrative.) So, I'm sorry, I will not let it happen again, at least not as many times in one week.
-adis!

The poll after the catastrophe

2007-09-27T18:44:00Z

Hi, it's me. My attempt at a t-shirt presale didn't go all that well, and I had to pull the plug. However, I'm not one to give up, so here I am going at it again from the beginning. If you go here you'll find a poll with five designs. This time I'm only going to offer for sale the designs that people adore, otherwise it's not economically doable, and I'll be forced to return the money again.
So, check them out, vote for one, and if your favorite makes the cut, I'd appreciate it if you buy one once the sales start.

***
I jumped on the fantasy football bandwagon, not only because it's super fun, but because it's the perfect opportunity to create Katie's team, The Los Angeles Smarty Pants. (Let's not get into how well I'm doing, shall we? Although, I accept any advice on wether I should start Ben Roethlisberger or Matt Schaub this weekend.)
But anyway, since the name of the team arose from the comic, here's a little something for you: An LA Smarty Pants wallpaper!
1024x768
800x600

Thanks!
-adis!

Semi-wish come semi-true

2007-08-30T18:19:24Z

Not so long ago, I mentioned my semi-guilt and semi-enjoyment in fantasizing about a certain athlete being horribly disfigured in a career-ending injury. Well, it wasn't that exactly, but I watched said athlete (who shall go unnamed) fail spectacularly yesterday. Not exactly a career-ending injury, but something I can revel in with no guilt.
I'm pretty sure he will come back to torment me, but in the meantime, specially today, all is well with the world.
-adis!

Threadless

2007-08-24T14:01:49Z

Out of wanting to see how it would do, I decided to submit a couple of things to threadless, to see if it gets printed (and win $2000, always welcome.) You can see them here:

and:

Finding Katie in places

2007-08-20T20:26:42Z

Sometimes I see a little girl, spunky and pensive, smartmouthed and smartheaded and I can't help to see Katie in them. Today, I was sort of reminded again after I found this on the internet:

It's a little girl freestyling a song about... Urethras. Silly stuff, but she's so tiny, and already so cute and smart! You'll want your own kids to be like her. Check it out.

She should win the Nobel prize for childhood.

Now go to bed,
-adis!

A Count Your Sheep perspective on Harry Potter

2007-07-24T17:37:38Z

*Ahem* SPOILERS!

Don't complain I didn't give you enough warning... So, given how Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows have dominated my life for the past four days, I'm here to let everything out of my chest and get on with my life. (I have things to do, dishes to clean and people to see, you know?) Life is the reason I only managed to finish the book on monday by 8pm, despite my best intentions, because yesterday was the only day I could devote the three hours it would take me to finish the five hundred pages I had left. But anyway, the book:

Honestly, it would have taken truly dreadful book to not be a satisfying read, so right from the start we know this is a critic-proof tale. And why is that? Well, at this point we love Harry and the world he lives in so much nothing can convince us against it. We also love a good mystery and plot twists, and when you are barraged by them for a good million words and about 10 hours of film and a sense of community with others like you, well, it's hard no to care.

"Wanting to know the rest" is what's carried me through the last three books, once the sense of wonderment has been pretty much assimilated by book four. From then on it's mostly about the quest to destroy Voldemort, and I'd already spent a lot of money on the books and the movies and countless hours drawing fanart; I was hooked, so I had to know how it all ends! We are too invested, which makes us all say, "Dear $34.99, it was nice to meet you, but you need to pass on to other hands so I can have that bundle of dead tree product."

And it ends well, as we imagined it would. Voldemort is defeated and our flawed and unsuspecting hero lives on to enjoy what seems a relaxing middle-class life. Which I'm all for, because only Spider-Man is meant to be eternally miserable, therefore heroic, and bound to his adventures forever. Frodo Baggins, come to think of it, also wins the day, but at the prize of never being all that well again. And Harry is neither, his 17-year long ordeal quite enough, and to be honest, I was more than pleased to see him happy in the epilogue, set 19 years later. For some reason, I imagined him having a pot belly, the true sign of male contentment.

From the very first book, the plots and how they are told have given me a feeling I've never been able to put into words, a feeling that things didn't happen like they would anywhere else, but it's not that, either. It wasn't a good feeling, I remember, but I grew used to it, and even welcomed it after a while. Which made the dull parts and supposed plot holes in this book irrelevant to me. This is how it is, and I liked it. It made me feel something was at stake and a bit tingly in the stomach, the way you feel when you say goodbye. My stomach is a good judge of books, and this one upset it enough to be considered highly enjoyable. It didn't surpass the feeling it got during the last passages of "The Amber Spyglass" by Philip Pullman, when it made me feel the stomach punch you feel when you fall in love. (This is why I'll never be a critic, I can't talk about my bowels to quantify my enjoyment of something, can I?)

As for our trio: Katie read it fast and loved it, her favorite part was Harry seeing his parents' spirits, Laurie wanted to know what happened to everyone else and to the wizarding world after the second war, but was happy to see Harry form his own family, and Ship knew how it would end all along.

-adis!

Friday the thirteen on monday

2007-07-16T19:53:06Z

When you see a man running down the street, get into Wal-Mart, and then storming out with a newly bought plunger in hand and see him fly down the street and back to his apartment, do you think it's obvious what the situaton is?

I have felt panic like that a few times in my life. It was horrible. The toilet starts to overflow and you really see your whole existence flash in front of your eyes. Hopefully no one who saw me running up and down the street suspected the rather uncomfortable situation I was in. I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy.

A few hours later, everything is back to normal. Luckily, nature knows what it's doing and it makes water evaporate after a while! Science works. (Not to mention soap, rag mops and yes, even plungers.)

The epilogue to this story? I took the longest shower ever.

Now go to bed,
-adis!

Shelter From The Storm

2007-05-24T21:30:04Z

It so happens that a few of my favorite musicians were all born within a seven day span in May, Morrissey on the 22nd, and Noel Gallagher on the 29th, but today it's Bob Dylan's birthday, and the point of this post is to celebrate the man who wrote my absolute, hands down favorite song of all time, Shelter From The Storm. I'm in love with embedded videos, so here's one of the original studio version, in a very odd video to say the least:

On a good day, it can make me cry.

But as you know, good ol' Bob tends to change the arrangements for his song in concerts, which results in wildy different songs, which you can see after the jump.

Here's a more rock and roll, "Hard Rain" version from 1976, which is my favorite variant:

A completely different one from 1995 in London, which feels quite soothing:

There are, of course, a few I don't like:

On second thought, this one is kinda growing on me.

It's specially one of the most recent ones that are not my cup of tea, this one from Philadelphia in 2002:

There are a lot more, neither of them alike which speaks of the creative mind (and ADD) of Dylan, which is why we love him, and why we celebrate him. So, cheers to you, my man, and thanks for my favorite song.

-adis!

adis_sheep @ 2007-05-21T15:04:00

2007-05-21T20:11:26Z

It's me. I'm sick with some kind of flu again, and I'm in my pijamas, so feel free to be envious.
As part of a sudden urge for giving readers more content and stuff to look at, here's a video of a little animation by Matt Wallace, a CYS fan .

If anyone else has made their own video, sign, song, mp3, smoke signal or whatever you might fancy, send it along and I'll gladly share it with people.

Now go to bed,
-adis!

The Tabloid and the Window

2007-05-14T16:48:15Z

The gossip making the rounds in my circle is that the best friend of a relative, whose spouse is overseas, might be now involved in a romantic affair with an international superstar. (How's that for a blind item?) I avoid the names, not to avoid the potential wrath of said superstar, but to avoid getting punched in the face by non superstars close to me who asked me to keep quiet about this. The thing is, I can't! So this is a compromise.
It's one of those things you don't expect to happen within two degrees of separation from your own unfamous self, the same way it surprises you when you are diagnosed with an incurable disease. Being this close to an illicit affair plastered on the tabloids is as rare as getting Krabbe Disease.
It's a bit of a shock, of the same kind you get when an old friend you haven't seen or an ex-boyfriend or girlfriend has suddenly become famous (or infamous.)
Rant aside, I'll keep you posted on any newer developments.

***

I don't think I've mentioned this before, but my apartment is next to a kindergarden, and from my window I can see children engaged in all sorts of activity, from bumping into one another during recess, to rehearsing for a festival with pre-recorded xylophone music, which they're doing right this instant. You'd think that given my line of work, I'd find a lot of inspiration just from looking at them. It's odd that I haven't yet. It makes me feel like a fake, so I just close the window.

-adis!

Is this what you'd call a review?

2007-05-07T15:42:33Z

I woke up to the news that Spider-Man 3 had made more money this weekend than any other in the history of humanity, planet Earth and the whole universe. And that's fine, as I'm amongst the ones who did like it.
I found it as enjoyable as the first two, which I never considered anywhere near brilliant or the apex of cinema, as some people believe. I haven't seen a superhero movie that I can call extraordinary. Batman Begins is probably the closest, but the trappings of the superhero story haven't still been adapted tot he trappings of the Hollywood script in a way that we haven't seen before. And, honestly, I'm fine with that.
As the lights go out inside a theater, I don't expect high art from a superhero film necessarily. If you know where to look, you'll find extraodinary, well narrated, ambitious and almost literary superhero stories in their natural medium, the comic books themselves.
It's as if as movies were thought to be the superior art form, where the ultimate story would have to be told, because its film version is what will ultimately come to people's minds whenever they think of a certain character, even if it rose to fame somewhere else. That's the price you pay when movies are that visible and widely marketed, I guess. As far as superheroes go, I'll stick to the books, and the movies can be the gravy.

Of course, the reverse is true. I've been wary of people attempting to translate movies into comics, which usually don't turn out well at all. What I'm trying to say is, don't expect the strengths of one specific story to work as well in a different medium, you might get dissapointed. Enjoy them, or try to, at least, for what they are.

And thus ends my rant to no one.

-adis!

Here's a gift and a little story: Most of you grew up with the traditional Spider-Man song, which is fine and catchy and everything. But some of us grew up watching that show with an entirely different theme song, which is just awesome. You see, most cartoons, when translated to other parts of the world either keep their original tunes in english or get translated versions of the exact same songs, like it's done in Diney movies. So it was quite rare that the old spidey cartoon featured an entirely different song in spanish. Not only that, but it had an entirely original soundtrack, that I owned in vinyl and danced to all the time. Good times.
Anyway, looking for it, I realized I'm not alone, and that the Internet is crowded with Spidey fans who get goosebumps when this song plays, as it has almost dissapeared from any official Marvel outlets, which is a shame. I mean, this song is MY childhood and MY Spider-Man, and they shouldn't dissapear! So, enjoy.

I still don't know who sings, though!

The Interview and the Emperor

2007-04-25T01:56:27Z

First announcement:
I was the subject of an interview by a fellow webcomic author by the name of Kathy Peterson, which you can read here. It's been a while since I did one of those which made it cool. It's always fun to answer questions about what's in my head.

Second announcement:
I had this little idea doodled in one of my notebooks, which after some tinkering became an idea for a picture book, which I have completed and that you can find for purchase here. It's called "Someone to see the Emperor", yet another story about children and the things they do and the relationships they make and what's in their head, and I hope someone out there likes it. I suppose some proper advertising is in order, but in the meantime, let this be the official press release. :)

now go to bed,
-adis!

Comic down April-02-07

2007-04-02T15:45:37Z

Hello, readers!
The keenspot servers woke up on the wrong side of the bed, it would seem and I can't update the comic. I'll keep trying today, so keep checking back!
Thanks,
-adis!

Politik and Pan

2007-03-08T17:00:36Z

First up, Coldplay.
Had I bought tickets for Sunday's concert, I would have been privileged by Jay-Z joining the band on stage, while Gwyneth, Michael Stipe, Gael García, and Beyoncé swayed their arms to the music from the crowd. At least that's what they say it happened. Instead, I attended Saturday's concert, which was fairly typical, but highly enjoyable. Usually, I'm pretty excited before the concert of one of my favorite artists, and I tend to first listen to their music incessantly for weeks in advance until about a week prior to the show. Then I institute an embargo on all of their music, news,thoughts and verything, so that by the time of the concert comes, I'm not sick of their songs.
This time around, I didn't need to. Despite being the soundtrack of my early twenties, I found it hard to swoon or drool over the upcoming concert. And it's not because I'm getting older: In november, I finally had the chance to see my absolute favorite artist in all of creation, a certain Stephen Patrick Morrissey, and I was as excited as schoolboy. (They get excited too, you know? Besides, it's Morrissey we're talking about.) So, with no pretensions and no expectations, I attended the concert and well, while not as relevant to my thoughts and feelings anymore, their songs are still the absolute best elevator music in the world. And I mean that as a compliment. "Fix You" played live was GRAND.

***

And now, Pan's Labyrinth.
What I love about guys like Guillermo del Toro is how they remind me of myself in their geekiness. Guillermo is above all, a reverent fan of his influences. It used to be, for guys like us, growing up in the third world where things don't get made, that the chance to be in the stage where what we admire is done was distant and impossible. You see a lot of that, reverent fans with encyclopedic notions of horror films, westerns, super heroes, Seattle's music scene, The Beatles, Evangelion or the Dallas Cowboys. This knowledge tends to be used on nothing, but a few are so skilled that, if given the opportunity, could be Offensive Coordinators for the 'Boys or Kurt Cobain's official biographers. They could even love American comic strips so much that they could come up with a concept for one so far removed from his own experience, that only his skill and love for the medium could make it work. (Or not, but believe me, he tries hard. *nudge* *nudge* *wink* *wink* and all that.)
For Del Toro, it was movies, more specifically, horror movies. The movie, it seemed to me, screams of him saying, "this is what the things I like made me." And what he is, is a virtuoso pop synthethizer of his geekness.
And I can absolutely relate to that, the movie is wonderful and magical and scary and sad. The sad, mixed with either the funny or the strange or the scary is one of my favorite things (as I'm sure you've found out by now.) So, get off your butt and go see it now.

-adis!

The Big Sleep

2007-03-02T16:43:45Z

I apologize for not posting anything recently, but I've had a good reason: the computer is too hot.
It's been unbelievably hot around these parts for the last few weeks around here, and when that happens, my computer feels like it's been possesed by the sun, and it makes my eyeballs sweat. So, I try to spend as little time as possible on the computer, that's why I didn't write any entries or answer any emails. But, if I do it early in the morning, I'm at no risk of my computer giving me a tan.

***

I began my movie watching schedule by watching The Departed, which in a way doesn't count, because I've been a fan of the original Hong Kong movie it's based on, called Infernal Affairs (but you knew that already. Yes, you did, yes you did.) It felt like one of the usual Scorsese manic affairs I love so much (Taxi Driver, Raging Bull) with tons of blood and none of that Aviator bullcrap. Still not perfect, but I'm glad I watched it.
Next up, Pan's Labyrinth over the weekend. Dreamgirls will have to wait a little more, sorry.

***

Speaking of going to the movies, here's something I like to do: sitting at the front rows, I wait for the big emotional release moment of the movie (when the girl tells the guy she's just a girl in love with a boy, for instance) and when it happens, I stop looking at the screen, turn around, and look at the people react. Thanks to the environment and the context and the lack of light, people forget they are in a public space and react the way they react the way they do if they were in the shower. That is, unashamedely sentimental. It might seem somewhat like an invasion of privacy, but I'm a writer doing reasearch, a field study in what makes people react in a story.

***

I need some suggestions on how to convince myself to go to bed early. Short of shock therapy, I'm open to suggestions.

***

Next up: Coldplay concert tomorrow.

-adis!

Velcro

2007-02-08T22:26:27Z

For years now, I've been using a non-wallet wallet. It's really an old jean's back pocket cut out. Any time in front of a cashier, it became a source of pride to reach into my pocket, take another pocket out and take my money out of it. I always got looks and compliments on how cool and idea it was, and it was an excellent ice breaker.
Obviously, the denim was beginning to show a lot of wear lately, and the girlfriend suggested it might be time to throw it away. Among other things, because it was a gift from another girl, many years ago. I've kept it mostly because of the cool than for the other factor, but she made a point that it can be rightfully bothersome when your significant other keeps a souvenir from a former someone relevant. And I agreed, and the thing is old, starting to yellow and it kinda smells, since I only washed it twice. I still might cut out the back pocket of another pair of jeans and relive the coolness, but I'm also thinking it might be time to grow up.
Throughout the years, I've come to collect a bunch of wallets I never used, or maybe because I was waiting for this day to arrive. I looked inside the drawer, and made a pick, see how it works out. So now, I'm using a wallet, a real grown up person wallet. It's red, it's blue, and it reads "Spider-Man" in big, bold, pointy yellow letters. Yep, that's about as mature as it gets.

***

Is it wrong to wish a painful, awful, messy career ending injury on a professional athlete, just because we feel wronged by the misplacing of his attributes on an opposing team that's dear to our hearts? I feel awfully conflicted by the revenge fantasies I've been harboring. Am I inviting bad karma into my life?

***

And as I type this, I've come across the news that Anna Nicole Smith has just died. When you are about 12, you discover that the opposite sex comes in different varieties, and for the first time, you are most impressed by the members with the most overwhelming attributes. One day you didn't care, the next day you care a lot. When I was that age, that's what Anna Nicole was. A shame.

-adis!

Tidbits

2007-01-29T23:05:37Z

-I've found a whole network of sites devoted to denouncing men who harass women on the street, what with the whole thing about a couple of entries ago: Holla Back. So yeah, there's no need to tolerate that anymore.

-Who should we call to get my idea of the Los Angeles Smarty Pants to play in the NFL off the ground? What should be their colors? Are they more offensive, or defensive oriented? 3-4? 4-3? West Coast Offense? No huddle? What do you think?

- I'm in need of a good, possibly free software to burn a data DVD. Every program I have now (Nero, Sonic, and some other thing called Cheetah) seems to hate me, and all they do is lay on the ground, curl up in the fetal position and call for their mommy. (Software calls for its developer.) and I'm left with nothing. Any suggestions?

-More help: I'd like to know how to effectively kick field goals on Madden 07 for the PC. On the Xbox it's pretty intuiive, but on the PC I either kick it too far wide and into the Jumbotron, or kick a straight low line into a referees' face. It's starting to cost me games, and as a future General Manager for the LA Smarty Pants, I can't have that!

- I'm starting to get annoyed at fast food places. They do these huge promotions to advertise their new and improved sandwiches, which are impossible to eat. I refuse to eat anything that weighs as much as a small child, and is just as messy. And they seem so proud of their super sandwiches, and all I do is yell at the TV: "Your new subway might have two times the meat, but I still have one time the mouth!" (Which reminds me of another concern: how can it have two times the meat, and cost half what it used to? I bet they're not paying cows very good wages. Or the elves who make the mustard either, for that matter.)

-Later this year, I'll be too old to audition for American Idol.

-If I sound off, it's because I'm on a lot of meds. Remember when I told you I was sick? I STILL AM. So now I'm using cough syrup to wash down the pills. Good times.

Now go to bed,
-adis!

The Out Of Body Shop Experience

2007-01-22T18:27:46Z

Went with the girlfriend to the Body Shop, which I entered for the first time in my life. My first thought was to feel very hungry. They sell this thing called Body Butter made out of more flavors than Baskin-Robbins could ever imagine, each one with its accompanying body gel, moisturizer, exfoliant, cleaner, toothpaste and shoe shiner. And women know, and are willing to use each and everyone of those products on themselves. (The papaya shoe shiner works wonders on your hair.) And I don't blame them, because they let you try it on to convince you, but cream is cream, what sells you on it is how it looks. And how it looks is delicious. Wonderfully, mouth watering delicious. The strawberry exfoliant looks like smooth, creamy jam from Europe. I kept thinking it was a shame you had to try it on your skin, and just wished someone there had some toast. They didn't, and so I had to brave it out and lick it off my finger.
Now, from what I had seen, everything in the store is natural, or as natural as it can be, with as little chemical wizardry as possible, and well, it says strawberry, and *looks* strawberry. Some ice cream looks like skin cream and tastes great, so, with a mouth full of hope and anticipation, I licked it off my fingers.

On our way back, we had to stop at 7-eleven so I could get some juice or something to kill the taste because I was about to throw up. When they say "Body Shop", they don't mean your mouth's invited too.

****

A few days later we went back to actually make a purchase since we had money to spend after winning at the slot machines (a good story for another day, my friends,) and she picked up the strawberry exfoliant of course, some vanilla lip balm and as we walked towards for the register I turned my head, and to my right stood a wonderful display of hemp products. Again, the whole works, the shoe shiner was there, the exfoliant was there, the lip balm was there, the shampoo, the gel, and the toothpaste, all made out of Cannabis Sativa (I checked the label.) Seriously, it was the nicest, best lit, professionally labeled, most handsome pot you could ever hope to see.
Now, I know hemp has very little to no intoxicating effects, but how did they figure out it would make good cream? In fact, I'm almost sure that it's the sort of thing you can only think about when you are high. I can see it clearly, two stoners were sitting on a couch puffing away, when one of them accidentally burned his arm with a joint.
"Dude, my arm!" said Steve.
"Dude, does it hurt?" asked Tom.
"Yeah, but... see how soft my skin feels!"
"Duuuuuuude."
And thus, a cosmetics empire was born.
Of course, I didn't lick it off my finger this time. I've learned my lesson.

-adis!

adis_sheep @ 2007-01-15T22:00:00

2007-01-16T04:00:29Z

I'm watching the Golden Globes right now. I've always watched these sort of shows because I've always been current and with the times, but for the past two years, I've had a tenuous at best grasp on the film industry. TV I do love and admire (The Office tends to be my favorite show these days, along with Friday Night Lights.) But the thing is, I haven't been to the movies more than twice in the past six months and less than ten in the past two years, and that is surprising for me. (A few of you know me from before, and I bet you'll be surprised to hear this too.) Anyway, just felt like sharing.

++++

I was on the subway on Sunday. In front of me, sat this young indie girl. She reached into her Pink Floyd bag and took out a CD walkman, grabbed one of her discs, put it on and started blasting. While I was sitting across from her smiling to George Carlin, she couldn't help herself but bang on imaginary drums and rip on air guitar. Ever since people started noticing me for reacting to whatever I listen to on the iPod, I feel sympathy for whoever gets carried away in the aural worlds they carry in their pockets. So, we got to the end of the line, got off, and as we were walking out, I saw that amidst the crowd, some guy had approached her, one of those guys who hit to women while riding mass transportation. And they bother me INTENSELY.

It's shameful to see men like me thinking that sharing a moving space is an invitation to make friends. While I've witnessed people meeting and getting along on subways and buses, the particular brand I loathe is the one-sided lothario playboy. They come up to a woman and talk her to death, as if she was the one interested in him, instead of him being the idiot attracted to her. They don't realize it makes women uncomfortable, and even more so, it's scares them! And no woman alive is going to respond to the romantic pursuit of a guy who scares them.

So I see them walk away, the poor girl looking like she wanted to run, and the guy just talking endlessly (I couldn't hear what they were saying, that's what I wanted an iPod for in the first place) but then I got thinking, should I do something? Should I go up to them and tell the guy that she's scaring the poor girl? Should I pretend to be her older brother or something? But who am I to do something like that? I'm just inferring things from their body language, it's not like he was chasing her with a knife. What if she liked him too? I've seen it happen before. But I don't know. When is it okay to intervene?

-adis!

Smile, and the world will smile with you...

2007-01-13T04:00:53Z

...it's a lie. They'll think you are a pervert.

I own an iPod (Nano, black, 1G, 4th generation. Some iPod owners are like proud parents, aren't they?), which I listen to all the time when I go out. Being the sort of person I am (weird) I walk or take the bus or the subway or whatever everywhere (Those comics with Laurie talking about cars are really about me.) Music is my thing, except that lately, I've been filling it with another subject of my fascination, comedy. So now I'm not only one of those glased-eyes zombies with earbuds on, I'm one that laughs. And that freaks people out.

It's sad that people don't expect you to smile if you happen to look in their direction, unless a)you are a sicko about to stab them, b)you are making fun of them (most of them look down to see if their zipper is up) and c)you are about to buy them a drink. Each one comes with its set of problems. When you are a sicko, people will clear the path for you to pass, or leave you ALONE IN THE CART. It's no lie, this has happened to me. The second category is the scary one, because when someone thinks you are making fun of them, only your blood can convince them otherwise. And through they years, I've grown fond of my blood, so I gotta be careful not to spill it for just anyone. But it's the third category the closer one to get me in trouble. Apparently, all that some people need before expecting a proposal is a smile. Men, women, groups,troupes, couples (!) sizes don't matter, I've been followed, or had someone stand ever so close to me (has someone ever stood so close to you that you were convinced they were a ghost trying to possess you?) probably in an effort to bask in the glow of my laughter. ("He laughs on his own, I bet he's the one!" they probably think.) Had I known smiling did the trick, I would have started when I was a teenager, because sweating and stuttering never did anything.

But no, none of the three are true, I'm just a peculiar guy trying to escape reality by hearing the funny words of someone else. Hear me roar. I'll be doing it under my breath, though. I'm not that far gone.

++++++

Thanks to everyone who commented on my last entry. I have a clearer picture now, shoes, like everything else fashion, is a matter or personal choice. Kinda like when I wear a t-shirt on top of a sweater, because I think I look good.

-adis!